It wasn’t willpower – it was the wine goblet

My partner used to drink his red wine from a tin cup.

Not exactly classy, but it had one thing going for it: you couldn’t fit much in there.

Then my brother-in-law gave him a proper wine goblet – this gleaming silver thing, big enough to double as a small trophy. Beautiful. Generous. And absolutely terrible for someone who already pours with enthusiasm.

Within weeks, his wine consumption had noticeably increased. Not because he suddenly developed a drinking problem or lost all self-control. The cup just made it easier to drink more.

I watched this unfold and had one of those lightbulb moments that felt embarrassingly obvious in hindsight.

We spend so much energy trying to force ourselves into better habits when we could just make them easier to do.

I’d been doing the same thing with those gorgeous oversized wine glasses that are everywhere now. You know the ones – they practically beg you to keep pouring. A standard glass of wine looks pathetic in them. Pop the same amount into an old-school 90s wine glass, and suddenly it seems generous.

Same wine. Same me. Different glass. Different outcome.

A scoop of mousse in a little ramekin feels like a proper treat. That same amount in a deep bowl feels like I’m being ripped off and disappears in seconds, leaving me hunting for more.

Keep your alarm next to your bed, and you’ll hit snooze. Put it across the room, and you won’t.

Leave indulgent foods where you’ll see them every time you open the pantry, and you’ll indulge more than you planned.

I’m not saying willpower doesn’t matter – of course it does. But why make everything harder than it needs to be?

Your environment shapes your behaviour, whether you’re paying attention or not. So instead of white-knuckling my way through every decision, I started getting strategic about it.

• I book something active at our typical weekly happy hour to reduce the temptation.

• I switched back to smaller wine glasses (and my partner returned to his trusty tin cup).

• I eat salads and veggies from massive share bowls, making it easier to eat more of the good stuff.

• I keep treat foods out of sight – not banned, just not front and centre.

• I removed social media apps from my phone.

• I drink water from a 1L glass, which makes staying hydrated automatic. (I also have a ridiculous 3.7L water bottle for day trips that makes everyone laugh.)

This isn’t about removing all temptation or pretending you don’t have preferences. It’s about reducing the friction between you and the choices you actually want to make.

You still have to show up. You still have to choose. But you don’t have to make it an uphill battle every single time.

This is what I help my clients figure out – not rigid rules or perfect discipline, but how to set up their lives so the good choices feel easier than the alternatives.